Many of the same things work for online flirting that work for “brick and mortar” flirting and all relationships begin with successful flirting. Flirting is an art that requires oozing confidence without being OTT. If you go too far, she will label you “slimy” If you don’t go far enough, she will label you “wimpy”. So how do you achieve that point half way between slimy and wimpy and do it online without using eye contact or body language? All you have is a computer an internet connection and membership in an online dating site, right?

1. Have fun! Be light-hearted, funny and entertaining. Make her eager to talk to you again. Flirting is playful.

2. Ooze confidence. Successful flirts have a positive outlook on life. You need to transmit the “feel good” factor. An optimistic attitude attracts females like honey attracts flies.

3. 3. Compliment her…and do it often and sincerely. Nothing opens doors like making her feel good about herself. She will want to spend more time with you and if she pays you a compliment say “thank you”. Do Not be self depreciating.

4. Listen…listen….listen. Pay attention to what she says and ask appropriate questions. Get her to open up and talk about herself. Make her feel like she is interesting and that you are interested in her. Works wonders!

5. Don’t be rude. Flirting does not include being sexually explicit nor taking offence if the lady isn’t responding to you. If she isn’t interested, take the hint and move on to the next prospect. If you get a lot of rejections, you should probably consider a different approach.

6. Send an email after you chat. This ranks right up there with sending a thank you note for a gift and it is vital to successful flirting.

Don’t try to go too fast. Flirting is the first step to a successful relationship.

Internet Dating – Finding Love Online

Online Dating

The very concept of internet dating scares some people. It can seem dangerous, and if it isn’t dangerous, it’s impersonal and caters toward people who can’t get a date any other way. With these assumptions and more behind the concept, it’s no wonder many singles don’t give internet dating a second glance.

However, more and more people are discovering the truth: these assumptions are false and can keep you from finding love and deep friendship online. As internet dating becomes more and more popular, it’s harder and harder for some to stay away, no matter what they believe or how much they want to.

Find the Truth

If you have stayed away from internet dating because it seems a little scary, rest assured that you’re not alone. However, if you want to find love and aren’t having success through any of the traditional ways, you might want to reconsider your choice to stay away from dating online.

Before you commit yourself to any one choice, it will help to evaluate the assumptions you’re carrying. If you believe that internet dating is dangerous, impersonal, or only for the socially inept, investigate these ideas to find out whether or not they’re actually true.

Talk to People

The best way to find out the truth about internet dating is to ask people who have tried it. Most likely, you know more than one person who has put up a profile on an internet dating site and communicated with several people that way. You might even know someone who met a significant other or even a spouse online. These are the people you’ll want to talk to.

Make sure you talk to more than one person, though, so you get an accurate picture of what it means to date online. One good or bad experience might color your view of internet dating in a way that isn’t accurate, but you should get a well-rounded point of view if you talk to several people who have tried it.

Do Your Research

In addition to talking to people who have dated online, do some reading on the subject. There are some great articles online, and books like this one can be especially helpful. Make sure that the information you get seems to come from a balanced perspective, and that it pertains to the specific type of internet dating you are thinking about pursuing.

Make Your Own Decision

More than anything else, make sure that the decision you make about internet dating is your own. In the end, it doesn’t matter what anyone else thinks about the choice as long as you are happy with it.

If you investigate and decide that there’s a good chance you could meet someone special online, pursue internet dating in spite of what other friends and family members might think. You might have to put up with some comments here and there, but the people who doubt your choice will think again after they see you find love online.

Your friend has decided that you need help with your social life so she sets you up with a blind date….a friend of a friend of a friend. You, foolishly, accept. Now there you are. It’s less than one hour since you were introduced. You are sitting in a Thai restaurant and you hate Thai food. The entrée has not yet been served. His idea of enlightened conversation is who will be in the final four…you aren’t into sports. He knows the weekly TV schedule verbatim….you haven’t sat through a movie in months because you run marathons and volunteer at the local food bank. He says, “Volunteering is a waste of time because you can’t help ‘those people’ anyway.” You look at your watch; see that it’s only been 10 minutes since you last looked at it the last time and wonder how long it is before you can gracefully remove yourself from the situation. Been there?

Now imagine a date with someone you met through internet dating and have been chatting online with and exchanging emails with for quite some time. First, you don’t need to be introduced. You already know this man. You are sitting in an Italian restaurant enjoying a delightful meal because you both know that the other’s favorite is Italian. The conversation flows easily as you discuss common interests. He runs marathons and loves history just like you do. You happily discuss the volunteer work that each of you is involved in. You look at your watch and discover that it is late…very late…where Has the time gone.

There is a big difference between a well-intentioned friend “setting you up” and choosing a man for yourself who shares your interests and tastes, isn’t there? Now which one would you rather have?

OK. You have joined a couple of dating services and written a killer profile. You’ve uploaded a good picture and now you are going to chat with a contact. What now? How do you start separating those who have real potential and those who don’t have any potential at all? You need to find out something about who this strange woman really is and not just who she wants you to believe she is. It would be nice if women wore labels like “Gold Digger” or “Daddy’s girl”….but they don’t so it’s up to you to find these things out and you can’t just ask direct questions. You need to know what mistakes you can avoid making and how to impress this lady if you decide you want to do that.

After you are past the initial small talk, ask her, “What are the biggest mistakes guys make when dating online?” Listen carefully to her answers. She’s going to tell you a lot about herself and her views on men in general.

Next you should ask her, “What do you really think about online dating?” Now she will tell you if she has had any bad experiences dating o line and help you to avoid making the same things wrong.

Now for the all-important one…..”What caused the break up in your last relationship?” If she puts all the blame on the guy, you should probably move on to the next prospect. If she takes all the blame herself, you should probably do the same. If she says the breakup was by mutual consent or that the relationship just wasn’t right for either of them, you’ve heard the right answer. Move forward but always with caution.

Asking the right questions will give you insight and make you more confident when you meet the lady for the first time.

All types of everyday activities are growing in popularity online these days like sharing photos and greeting cards. In fact, both of these even go hand in hand with online dating opportunities, one of the most popular online activities for singles today.

Before actually meeting in person, many dates get acquainted online first. Here’s how.

Photos – As a wonderful keepsake of your budding romance, create an online photo album for your new cyber-mate. Include digital photos of favorite outdoor scenes, pets, flowers, cars, silly moments, your computer corner or laptop, etc. Then you’ll even have more to discuss during online dates via emails and chat rooms. Search for “photo albums” to find places that store your photos.

Greeting Cards- Regardless of where the person lives, you can mail a greeting card. If privacy and security is an issue, check into renting an inexpensive P.O. Box (check the Yellow Pages). You do not have to be an artist to make something homemade and special for the new friend in your life. Even making a special, personalized greeting card would be appreciated and show your date that you care enough to take the time needed to make something by hand. Search your favorite search engine for online greeting cards to send, too. They range from free to low cost and can be sent in a click.

So get online and get active! No need to risk meeting in person until you get more familiar with each other online first. So take the online plunge!

Just like regular real-world relationships, online relationships need tending, to grow over time. Here are some quick growing tips.

1.    Take time and make time. Does your online date get in touch with you regularly? Do you do the same? Neglecting virtual meetings can be considered abuse or neglect, so treat each other’s time with respect. If it’s lacking, might mean time to move on.

2.    Communication needs to “feel” right for both of you. If one of you is too pushy about meeting, for instance, that can give off bad vibes. So don’t rush. Take time to learn more about each other and develop trust.

3.    Respect each others privacy. Don’t share personal email addresses or digital photos online, for example, if your online date sent you the information in confidence.

4.    Share special online and offline fun times. Online – send greeting cards, links to favorite places to upload digital photos of your favorite pet, download music and video clips, post on favorite forums of interest. Offline- if you’re exchanging addresses or post office boxes, send print greeting cards and postcards, small items from your area (like a key chain with your state bird).

Tend your online relationship. Water it with care and over time it can sprout and grow.

While you search the internet for that special lady…the one of your dreams…your soul-mate…the other half of yourself, you can do a lot of things right.  Sadly, you can, also, do a lot of things wrong….things that will guarantee failure and a broken heart.   Out in the “real” world, being aggressive, demanding perfection and even little white lies are all ingredients for success.  However, those same qualities are killers when you are dating online and off line, too, for that matter.

There is a big difference between being aggressive or confident and being too aggressive, over-confident, or just plain sleazy or slimy from a woman’s point of view. If you push too hard for a face-to-face, you will come across as too aggressive…maybe even, scary.  Try to remember that you are not trying to close a business deal and keep the relationship progressing at a slow but steady pace.  Patience is the key.

Nobody is perfect.  We are all flawed in some way or another…and that includes you, as well.  If you expect the woman to be absolutely perfect and demand that, you will always be disappointed.  Demanding perfectionism in your work is one thing.  Demanding perfectionism from a friend, co-worker or a lady you are interested in is not just fine.  It won’t happen.  Expect flaws and just deal with them.  Decide the ones you can live with and those you can’t.

Little white lies and false fronts won’t work.  Be honest from the beginning of a relationship.  Write your profile.  Make it interesting but don’t make false statements.  The truth will come out eventually anyway.  If you say you are a lawyer who makes a million bucks a year and you are really an electrician that makes $75,000, you have set yourself up for failure.

Remember…don’t be too aggressive, expect to ever find perfection or put on a false front.